Heath Houston Thanks for your thoughtful reply. I don’t ever risk my heart because there is a part of me that is terrified and this has to do with my past. Certainly not a logical part of me. I know a lot of men are great people but unfortunately the fear is more primal. Therapy has been incredible for me as I realize that getting over my fear will happen if I have stronger boundaries and also I will need exposure therapy and I now understand how to go about working on these two things.

I have a great deal of gratitude because I do have a lot of love in my life already, my kids, my pets, my friends and I wonder if this is all the love I can take in? Its a lot of sweetness already and I’m happy.

Wether I ever overcome my fear or not is not something thats up to me but my therapist says to have have faith in the process and I will be surprised. So much good has already happened for me that I am no longer looking for any particular outcome.